One of the things I was told by more experienced mentors when I started practicing is that I needed to “learn how to lose.” Having grown up in a family where my father was a coach, losing was anathema. “Show me a good loser and I’ll show you a loser” was a common refrain in our household. But in my practice of litigation, I quickly learned that winning was relative and losing was inevitable. After all, in any trial, the cards you have to play are largely outside of your control. Our client’s action (or inaction) will dictate how a judge or jury sees our case. And it can sting when you spend weeks in trial, giving up sleep while you maintain that singular focus on your client’s case, pouring your sweat and emotion into the appeal to the jury — only to have them reject what you have been arguing. As one crusty trial warrior told me after a particularly hard result in trial, “They weren’t buying what I was selling.”
Originally Published in West Virginia Lawyer - December 2022.
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