A&O alumna Stephanie Camilleri discovered she had attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) after her daughter was diagnosed with the same condition. Drawing on her experience as a lawyer and a parent, Stephanie created her coaching and advocacy business, The ADHD Advocate.

Stephanie Camilleri always had a passion to help people and to understand how the brain works. Growing up in Australia, she wanted to be a psychiatrist, but just missed out on the grades she needed so, encouraged by her parents, she decided to study law.

As a law student, Stephanie faced challenges keeping on top of all the studying, not knowing her undiagnosed neurological condition was the reason why her brain seemed to work differently from those of her fellow students. It forced her to develop her own strategies to succeed. “One of the many characteristics of ADHD is having a weak working memory, which meant a lot of last-minute cramming for me before exams,” she says.

Not for the first or last time, she found herself working harder and longer than her neurotypical colleagues. Stephanie learned speed-reading to compensate for her difficulty in digesting information. She also avoided participating in class. “Thinking I might not be able to recall the correct information made me anxious so I wouldn’t speak up. I realise now that meant I missed out on taking part in interesting discussions.”

Following her studies, Stephanie trained and qualified at Coudert Brothers in Sydney. A stint in the firm’s New York office opened her eyes to the opportunities to travel that a career in law could offer.

After a spell in property finance with Blake Dawson Waldron, in 2006 Stephanie joined A&O in London for a job in real estate finance.

“I loved working with such accomplished and interesting people at A&O,” she says. “It was all so exciting and varied. I got to travel to Norway for a celebration dinner after a deal closed. I felt really valued and my work felt important.”

The struggle for balance and boundaries

Stephanie found stimulation in the high profile deals, removing the danger of becoming bored. “Boredom to people with ADHD is like kryptonite to Superman. I needed the challenges to make me perform and keep me motivated. Work deadlines kept my ADHD brain focused and client demands removed distractions.”

For Stephanie, having ADHD meant she was hyper-focused on her work and she struggled to set boundaries for herself. “For someone with ADHD, finding balance is the holy grail,” she says.

Australia eventually beckoned when Stephanie wanted to raise her children with her wider family nearby. She joined the Project Finance team at the Australian bank Westpac, where she enjoyed working with a variety of different industries.

A move back to the UK – this time with three children – followed and Stephanie began working at Westpac’s London office in the Global Derivatives Reform team where she was responsible for implementing financial regulations. Though it was “a high pressure environment and a stressful job,” her ADHD meant she was “motivated and stimulated by the urgency of the trading environment.”

The importance of a diagnosis

Stresses were developing at home too when the behaviour of Stephanie’s eldest daughter became concerning. “She was inattentive, impulsive, and hyperactive, but she was misdiagnosed with sensory processing disorder so we weren’t getting the help we needed.”

It took two years for Stephanie’s daughter to be correctly diagnosed. Stephanie was reluctant at first to give her ADHD medication, but when she did, she saw an instant change.

"I had my first real conversation with my daughter the day she started taking the medication. It was like she was present for the first time in her life.”

Stephanie began noticing traits in her own behaviour that made her start to analyse herself. She saw a psychiatrist who eventually diagnosed her with ADHD.

Stephanie started medication like her daughter.

“It was like the world stood still,” she says. “For the first time I was able to stop working on autopilot. I wasn’t just reacting to work demands anymore, and I found I could reflect on what I really wanted to do with my life.”